What is Self-Integrity?
I want to talk to you about self-integrity. I always thought I was pretty integral myself, I’ve had several people comment and tell me I showed integrity and even shared examples. As I was patting myself on the back for being so integral, I realized there was one person I was not showing true integrity too… ME!
I started looking at my life, and I was correct. I would show integrity to everyone else. If I committed to doing something for someone, I did it. Then I realized I was not showing myself the same integrity. I would make a commitment to myself, and that promise would be pushed aside. The ease of not following through was shocking and relatively consistent.
The story I was creating for myself is, “It doesn’t matter what you want, only what others want.” The damage to training my mind to not follow through starts to transfer to all areas of my life. Let me talk a little more about that, one of our greatest gifts we can give to somebody is our time, our word, integrity is our gift to the world.
Your Word is Your Bond
My dad taught me at a very young age, when you commit to doing something, do it. If you tell somebody you are going to do something, you do it. Even if you don’t like doing it or don’t want to do it, still do it. You said you are going to be there, be there. If you commit to it, then show up and do it. The critical reason is we need to have the integrity.
The primary reason is we need to have integrity with yourself. Outside world may think you, have a lot of integrity, but inside if you are not being real and integral to yourself, then we indeed are not showing real integrity.
Let me give a couple of examples and this is what kind of hit me when I was thinking about this. There are many times when I said I was going to wake up at five o’clock and going to do yoga, run, or whatever to get in shape. Then five am rolls around, click, I hit the button and go back to sleep.
I give my self-thousands of excuses, which are valid, “I went to bed late. The kids woke me up, and I could not get any sleep, etc.” I am the master of excuses when it comes to my internal commitments.
My Eyes Were Opened
If I do not honor the word to myself, then I don’t believe myself. I don’t trust myself. Lack of trust in myself is holding me back, that’s a problem. I have genuinely fallen short in honoring my own commitments.
I could, unfortunately, recognize so many times that I did not show integrity to myself I did not believe me. Here’s an example:
- I said I would stop this or that and I wouldn’t stop.
- I’ll get up in the morning to exercise, nope.
- I’m going to take my kids fishing once a week.
This was just a few areas that I discovered I was not being integral with myself. Starting to be mindful of my thoughts, I recognized that as I set goals, internally, I was already creating excuses.
Goal Setting the Right Way
In light of my discovery, I have a whole new way of looking at goals. I only set goals that I want. The goals that when I say them, stirs something inside me. My insecurities are no longer driving me, and I’m not setting goals for others.
Writing and creating a podcast is one of those goals. After my epiphany, I have told myself unless I am out of the country, or where I can not do a podcast, I will be here. I’ll show up. If I have an anniversary, or a family event that comes up I will let you know ahead of time. That’s my commitment to you, and to myself. I’m going to show integrity within myself. The power of teaching your mind and body self-mastery is immense. I want myself to realize that if I commit to something, no matter what, I am going to do it. If I say I’m going to lose ten pounds, it’s gone. Whatever the commitment, it happens.
Showing Integrity NOW!
I’m committing to myself that I am going to do everything I can to show integrity to myself from now on. My mind and body will learn that if I say I’m going to do something, it will be done. The level of trust my mind and body are going to have will create many degrees of success.
I want you to take a moment and look at your life, where you are at? What commitments have you made but were not honest with yourself? Do NOT beat yourself up or feel shame for your lack of self-integrity.
I’m not saying you, or I am awful. You have just recognized areas for an upgrade of life. I just had this discovery and that this is going on. That is why I am letting you know so that you can be mindful of your commitments. I’m hoping my insights help you, self-integrity is mind-blowing to me.
Higher Level of Commitments
I’ve found that since setting the desire to have self-integrity, I’m completing more goals; I’m living more present. I’m showing up and showing integrity to me and others. Opening my eyes to self-integrity, I no longer make a promise that I will NOT keep. If I say, I’m going to do something wake up at 5 o’clock I’m going to do it, which I’ve been doing for several months now. 🙂
Story of Geronimo
I heard a story about Gerimno where he would have to ride two hours to meet someone, receive instruction and then ride back. One day he woke up and he was sick, really sick. It was winter, and it was cold. When he started meeting the gentleman, there was a commitment of same time, same place every week.
Geronimo woke up, road two hours to tell this gentleman that he will not be able to meet today. When Geronimo arrived the man asked him, “Why did you ride all the way here to tell me that you wouldn’t be able to meet today? Why didn’t you stay home?”
Commitment = Integrity
Geronimo said, “Because I said I would be here.”
Geronimo had all of the excuses in the world he could have used, sick, snowing, and cold, etc. he honored his commitment. He showed that he had integrity for himself and for others. Geronimo rode two hours to meet a man to tell him he wouldn’t be able to meet with him. Then he rode back so he could get his rest. That is true integrity.
What if Geronimo said,”I’m not going to go, he’d understand?”
I do believe it’s true the man he was meeting would have understood why he couldn’t meet up but there was a much higher law Geronimo followed, his own. Mentally and subconsciously when we make a commitment our brains start a connection to make it happen; however, if we don’t honor that commitment our brains begin to create a new story such as, “Eh, he doesn’t really mean what he’s saying.”
If you commit to doing something, do it with 100%. Don’t give yourself or others excuses, no outs.
Commit Fully Self-Integrity
I talked to an individual who was talking about building a business. I told him I could help him, but he had to commit to doing certain things. I asked him, “Will you commit to this marketing plan?” and he said, “Yes I’ll do that.”
It started off fantastic than it happened, the excuses started to come; my daughter had this my son had that, my … excuse after excuse.
At first, I was like no big deal, but I realized self-integrity is what he was lacking. When you commit to something, do it, don’t give up, keep going. If you say, you are going to do it say it from bottom of feet to the tip-top of your head.
Commit entirely don’t lie to yourself or anybody else. IF YOU COMMIT to doing it, DO IT, especially if it’s personal commitment!
I hope you enjoyed it and I hope you realize how important it is, to be honest with your self. Your all wonderful and I love you all. Have a great day!
Once you build trust and integrity with yourself, studies have shown productivity in all aspects of our life increase a lot. I was blown away when I heard that, and I have discovered this was true for me too.
I challenge you, as well as myself, look in those areas of your life where you have not shone integrity to yourself? What commitments did you make that you did not keep?
After asking yourself these questions, then ask yourself, is this something I want to commit to? Then if it is, do not let anything stop you.
You’re Amazing, Believe It.
Mentor, Personal Development, Speaker – Tony Rhoton